I'll add them as I hear them. I try my very hardest to make sure to quote correctly and give proper credit the first time, but I don't double-check or cross-reference. I hope to at the very least embody the essence of the quote. If you spot an error or such please let me know.
I've separated the MST3K quotes.
Hello, Computer.12k WAV and source.
What's a Yogi-ism?
The world will little note, nor long remember, what we say here . . .
Fine words! I wonder where you stole them.
I do remember. I just remember differently.
Roscoe came in and finished out the ballgame, a little shaky, didn't get a save because of the rules. He did not have -- he did not pitch three innings, and he came in without the on-deck batter being the batter that he would face in his next approach to pitching to the hitters.
When I go to get my shoes shined, I gotta take their word . . .
On a scale of one to infinity he ranked about a five.
Mr. President . . . that's not entirely accurate.
All right, guys. Same play.
Sweet amnesia, come and set me free.
Did you send us most of it?
Looks like you got some entrails on you there, pal.
Me next, me next, me next!
Hey, how 'bout that?
What do you mean, offense?
"What is crueler? To let a wound of the heart fester, or to simply cut it out?" --Crovax
You can prove anything you want by coldly logical reason -- if you pick the proper postulates. . . .
Have fun watching the VCR.
This is not the way cats are conserved.
Death by stereo!
You see, we leased this back from the company we sold it to, and that way it comes under the monthly current budget and not the capital account.
Leave now or be hunted for sport.
What broke loose is popularly and succinctly described as hell.
May I still play football if I wear gloves?"
All the whole numbers have been retired.